saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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