I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Pants 0. Shit 1.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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