youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize