I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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