You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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