Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
Blood and glitter go together right?
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
17 People Reveal The Reasons Behind Their Foot Fetish
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?