I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
