Are we in a gay sports bar?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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