In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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