I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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