I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
