The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
