Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
