I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
