Where did you get a picture of my penis
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
