Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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