No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Randomize
