I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
