I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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