Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
