Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
