You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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