so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize