I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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