is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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