I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
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he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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