i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
We need a shit load of segways right now
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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