now i know why i became what i already was.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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