I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
