bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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