That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
