oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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