I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize
