Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I bet he comes in French.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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