Barsexuality is the new black.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
