we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Michael Bay diarrhea
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize