Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
We had sex on a dog bed..
BRING THE BAGELS
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
