There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
