on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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