O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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