Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
