I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize