I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
