after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
