bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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