I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
