Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
