Nicole vs. Life
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
