Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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