Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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