I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
